Stalking: The Complete Guide to Definition, Laws, Warning Signs, and Help

What Is Stalking?

Stalking is a course of conduct directed at a specific person that would cause a reasonable person to fear for their safety or the safety of others, or to suffer serious emotional distress. The key ideas are repetition, targeting, and fear.

• Repetition. Stalking is a pattern, not a single act. Laws often call this a course of conduct.
• Targeting. The behavior is aimed at a particular person.
• Unwanted. The person has made clear, or a reasonable person would understand, that the attention is not welcome.
• Fear or distress. The effect on the person is serious. See fear and emotional distress in stalking cases.

The Office of Justice Programs states that stalking is a crime in all 50 states and at the federal level, and is dangerous and potentially lethal. It is not flattery, persistence, or romance. For the full definition and examples, read what is stalking.

How the Law Defines Stalking

Every state has a stalking law, and the wording differs. Most share several elements.

• A pattern of conduct over time.
• Conduct directed at a specific person.
• A requirement that the conduct causes, or would cause, a reasonable person to fear for their safety or suffer substantial emotional distress.
• A mental state, such as intent to harass, intimidate, or place under surveillance, or knowledge that the conduct would cause fear.
• Coverage of conduct done directly, indirectly, or through third parties, in many states.

Federal law adds protection when stalking crosses state lines or uses electronic communication. The interstate stalking statute, 18 U.S.C. 2261A, covers traveling across state lines or using an interactive computer service, an electronic communication service, or another facility of interstate commerce to engage in a course of conduct with intent to kill, injure, harass, intimidate, or place someone under surveillance, when the conduct causes or would be reasonably expected to cause serious fear or substantial emotional distress. The Department of Justice summarizes the law on its interstate stalking page. Learn more in federal stalking laws explained and understanding stalking laws.

Common Stalking Behaviors

Stalkers use many tactics, often at once. The CDC's national survey asks about behaviors that include the following (NISVS stalking data brief).

• Unwanted phone calls, texts, emails, and social media messages.
• Approaching the person or showing up where they are.
• Following and watching.
• Sending unwanted cards, letters, flowers, or gifts.
• Leaving strange items for the person to find.
• Sneaking into the person's home or car.
• Using GPS or other technology to track or spy.

Other common behaviors include contacting the victim's family, friends, or employer, posting about the victim online, impersonating them, and publishing their personal information. See stalking without words: following and tracking and can calls, texts, and emails be stalking?

Types of Stalking and Types of Stalkers

Stalking is often described by the relationship between the stalker and the victim, or by the method used.

• Intimate partner stalking. Current or former partners are a leading group of stalkers, and this type is associated with higher risk.
• Acquaintance stalking. Coworkers, classmates, neighbors, friends, and friends of friends.
• Stranger stalking. Less common, but possible, including through online contact.
• Cyberstalking and electronic stalking. Use of devices, accounts, and online platforms. See what is cyberstalking and electronic stalking.
• Stalking by proxy. Use of other people to monitor or contact the victim. See stalking by proxy.

Clinicians who study stalking describe patterns such as rejected former partners, resentful stalkers, people seeking intimacy, socially inept suitors, and predatory stalkers. Real cases blend these. For more, read facts about stalkers and who stalks and how long it lasts.

How Common Is Stalking?

Government surveys show that stalking affects millions of people.

• About 1.3% of people age 16 or older, or 3.4 million, were stalked in 2019, according to the Bureau of Justice Statistics.
• Women were stalked at 1.8% and men at 0.8%.
• The CDC found more than 1 in 5 women (22.5%) and about 1 in 10 men (9.7%) were stalked at some point in their lives.
• Only 29% of victims reported the stalking to police in 2019.

For a full breakdown, read stalking statistics in the United States, how common is stalking, and cyberstalking statistics.

Who Is Affected

Anyone can be stalked, but data show patterns.

• Women are stalked more than twice as often as men, but men are stalked too.
• Younger adults have had higher rates in BJS data.
• CDC's 2016/2017 report found a greater burden among American Indian or Alaska Native people and multiracial people.
• Most victims know their stalker, and many are stalked by a current or former partner.

Read who is most at risk of stalking and are most stalkers men? for details and limits.

Warning Signs You May Be Being Stalked

Trust patterns that feel wrong, even when you can't prove them. Common signs include:

• Someone repeatedly contacts you after you ask them to stop.
• A person shows up where you are without a reason.
• They know things about your routine or plans that you didn't share.
• Messages arrive from new accounts after you block someone.
• Friends, family, or coworkers report that someone is asking about you.
• Gifts, items, or deliveries arrive that you didn't invite.
• Your accounts or devices behave oddly.

Use the stalking behavior checklist to review specific behaviors, and when unwanted contact becomes stalking to judge the threshold.

Warning Signs of Escalation and Violence Risk

Not every stalker becomes violent, but some situations are more dangerous. Concerning factors include a former partner as the stalker, past violence, threats, access to weapons, fixation, escalating contact, and recent separation. BJS found that 67% of victims who experienced both in-person and technology-based stalking feared being killed or physically harmed. Read do stalkers become violent, stalking warning signs and violence risk, and stalking threats explained. Use the Risk Assessment to gauge your situation.

Stalking and Technology

Technology is part of most modern stalking.

• Account access: passwords, shared devices, and recovery settings.
• Location tracking: hidden trackers, location sharing, and car or family-plan apps.
• Spyware: software that monitors messages, calls, and location. See stalkerware.
• Social media: monitoring, fake accounts, and impersonation.
• Exposure: people-search sites that list addresses and relatives. See stalking websites and how to remove yourself from data brokers.

Start with the complete guide to digital safety and the Safety Audit.

Your Legal Options

Stalking can be addressed through the criminal system, civil courts, or both.

• Criminal charges. Police and prosecutors can charge stalking. See how stalking cases move through the justice system.
• Protective orders. A civil court can order a person to stop contact and stay away. Names and rules vary by state. Read protection against stalking and use the TRO Builder.
• Federal law. Interstate stalking, cyberstalking, and violating a protection order across state lines can be federal crimes.
• Civil remedies. An attorney can explain whether other claims may be available.

Browse our State Reporting Guide for your state's official contacts and order types.

How to Document Stalking

Good documentation is the foundation of every other step.

• Keep a dated log of every incident. See how to keep a stalking log.
• Save messages, emails, voicemails, and call logs, with sender details and dates visible.
• Capture online content with the full web address, username, date, and time.
• Record witnesses and anything that supports your account.
• Store copies where the stalker can't access them.

Read evidence that holds up in court and use the Evidence Auditor.

How to Report Stalking

You can report to several places, and you can use more than one.

• Local police. Bring a timeline and evidence. See how to report stalking and how to report a stalker to the police.
• The FBI's Internet Crime Complaint Center for online or cross-state crime. See how to report online stalking.
• Platforms, through their reporting tools. Use the Social Media Reporting Guide.
• Employers and schools, if the stalker is connected to them.
• State agencies, listed in the Office for Victims of Crime state directory.

How to Build a Safety Plan

A safety plan prepares you before an emergency. A good plan includes a safe person you can contact at any hour, a code word, a safe place to go, a go-bag with essentials, a plan for your home, work, and commute, and a plan for your phone and accounts. Read how to build a safety plan and generate a printable plan with the Safety Plan tool.

Stalking at Work, at School, and in Other Settings

Stalking often spills into the places you spend your time.

• Work. Tell HR or security, ask that your schedule and location not be shared, and document incidents. The Equal Employment Opportunity Commission explains workplace harassment when it is based on a protected characteristic.
• School and campus. Contact campus police or student affairs and ask about no-contact directives and accommodations.
• Home and neighborhood. Tell neighbors or building management what to do if someone asks about you.
• Custody and family situations. Keep communication brief and written, and don't use children to carry messages.

The Protection Guide walks through 100 scenarios across these settings.

The Emotional Impact, and Getting Support

Being stalked is exhausting and frightening. Many people experience anxiety, trouble sleeping, hypervigilance, and a sense of losing control. These reactions are normal responses to an abnormal situation.

• Talk to someone you trust.
• Consider a counselor or doctor. Use FindTreatment.gov to find mental health services.
• Call or text 988 if you feel overwhelmed or unsafe with your thoughts.
• Read coping after being stalked.

How to Help Someone Who Is Being Stalked

If someone tells you they are being stalked, believe them. Offer practical help, such as sitting with them while they save evidence or going with them to report. Don't confront the stalker, don't share the person's location, and respect their choices about what and when to report. Encourage a safety plan and help them find official resources.

Common Myths About Stalking

Many myths delay help: that stalkers are strangers, that only women are stalked, that no threats means no danger, that blocking ends it, and that police can't act until someone is hurt. In fact, most victims know their stalker, about 1 in 10 men are stalked, stalking is dangerous even without threats, and a pattern of conduct can be reported before any physical harm. See stalking myths and facts.

If You Are Worried About Your Own Behavior

If you recognize yourself in this guide as the person who can't stop contacting or watching someone, help is available. Stopping contact, deleting what you have gathered, and talking to a counselor can protect both you and the other person. Read stalking treatment options for people who can't stop and call or text 988 if you are in distress.

Where to Go Next

• Understand it: What is stalking?, facts about stalkers, stalking vs. harassment.
• Protect yourself: Stalking prevention, how to stop a stalker, how to build a safety plan.
• Report it: How to report stalking, report stalking in your state.
• Get help: Resources for stalking victims and the Stalking Resource Center guide.

What to Do in the First 24 Hours

If you have just realized that what is happening to you is stalking, the first day matters, but it does not have to be perfect. Focus on a few things.

1. Assess your immediate safety. Is the person nearby, or do they know where you are right now? If you feel in danger, go to a public place or a trusted person's home and call 911. Do not wait for proof.
2. Write down what has happened. Start a timeline from the first incident you can remember. Include dates, places, and what the person did or said. Rough notes are fine. You can refine them later.
3. Save what you have. Take screenshots of messages, social media activity, and call logs with dates and sender details visible. Save voicemails. Store copies somewhere the stalker cannot reach, such as a new email account or an offline drive.
4. Tell one person you trust. Choose someone who will believe you and keep what you say private. Agree on a code word that means you need help.
5. Pause on engaging. Don't reply to the person, argue, or retaliate. If you must say something, say once, clearly, that you do not want contact, and then stop.
6. Secure the basics. Change your email password first, then your phone account. Turn on multi-factor authentication. Use a safe device.
7. Take the Risk Assessment and start a Safety Plan. They take only a few minutes and give you a starting point.

You do not need to report to police, remove your data, or file for an order on day one. You are building a foundation.

What Not to Do

Some well-meant reactions make a bad situation harder. Try to avoid these.

• Don't confront the stalker in person or alone. It can escalate the situation and put you at risk.
• Don't delete evidence, even if it is upsetting. You can ask a friend to review messages if reading them is too painful.
• Don't block before you document. Capture the content first.
• Don't try to track or investigate the stalker yourself. It can create legal risk and danger. Let law enforcement do it.
• Don't post publicly about the situation in a way that reveals your location or plans or that could inflame the stalker.
• Don't assume it will stop on its own. Some stalking fades, but you can't count on it.
• Don't blame yourself. Stalking is the stalker's behavior, not a consequence of anything you did or didn't do.

If you are unsure about any of these, read how to stop a stalker for what tends to work and what doesn't.

A Note on Using This Guide

This guide is meant to be read in pieces. You can skim the headings to find what you need, follow the links to deeper articles, or read it start to finish. Nothing here replaces advice from a lawyer, a counselor, or the police, and laws differ from state to state, so always confirm details for your location.

Stalking thrives on isolation and doubt. Information, documentation, and a plan are the antidotes.

Sources and further reading

• Stalking (Office of Justice Programs)
• Stalking Victimization, 2019 (Bureau of Justice Statistics)
• CDC: NISVS 2023/2024 Stalking Data Brief (Sept. 2025)
• Interstate Stalking (U.S. Attorney's Office, N.D. Georgia)
• 18 U.S.C. 2261A (Stalking) - U.S. Code via GovInfo
• Help in Your State (Office for Victims of Crime)
• Harassment (U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission)
• SAMHSA: In Crisis? Find Help Now (988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline)
• FindTreatment.gov (SAMHSA)