Recognizing Intimate Partner Violence: Warning Signs
Important: This article is for informational and educational purposes only and is not legal, medical, or professional advice. If you are in immediate danger, call 911 (United States) or your local emergency number.
Intimate partner violence (IPV) is often invisible from the outside. It rarely starts with physical harm — it starts with control: monitoring your phone, isolating you from friends, demanding to know where you are. Stalking is frequently part of the same pattern.
Forms of Intimate Partner Violence
- Physical — hitting, grabbing, blocking, or threatening harm.
- Emotional — name-calling, humiliation, gaslighting.
- Financial — controlling money, sabotaging credit, blocking work.
- Digital — tracking your location, reading messages, demanding passwords.
Warning Signs of Coercive Control
Coercive control is a pattern of domination that can be present even without physical violence. Watch for excessive texting, demands to share your location, checking your phone, isolating you from friends and family, and punishing you for perceived disobedience. These are not signs of love — they are early warning signs.
Stalking often begins during or after the relationship. Research shows that 76% of women murdered by an intimate partner were stalked first. Stalking is one of the strongest predictors of future violence.
Check your situation with the Risk Assessment →A criminologist-based tool that estimates your threat level.What to Do
If you recognize these signs, trust your instincts. Document what is happening, tell a trusted person, and create a safety plan before you need it. You do not need to wait for physical harm to take action.
Excessive texting and location-checking are not romance — they are control.
Frequently asked questions
Is stalking a form of intimate partner violence?
Yes. Stalking by a current or former partner is a recognized form of IPV and one of the strongest predictors of escalation.
What is coercive control?
A pattern of domination through monitoring, isolation, and threats that strips a person of autonomy, even without physical violence.
What should I do if I recognize these signs?
Document incidents, tell someone you trust, assess your risk, and make a safety plan. Seek professional help and, if in danger, call 911.